Agenda

[neversremedy8]

The Blogger Agenda from wicked_wish, the ever-witty wonder. (You know you want to click that link.)

I love hearing about the gay agenda. Not only are we an army--we recruit from high schools and through PBS, didn't you know?--but we also have an agenda: to take your straight-laced sons and daughters, pluck them from their Bible study groups, and turn them into fairies and butch dykes. Got that? Be All (the Gay) That You Can Be! We're going to hell, and we're taking your children with us! Bwahahahaha.

Hey, if we're an army, does that mean we're at war with someone? 'Cause you know, I want to be running spec. ops. into heated suburban territory to retrieve our comrades in make-shift POW camps in the back yards and garages of "righteous" civilians. It'll be like gay capture the flag complete with the tagged jailers. Yay! I rocked at running retrievals.

Things are getting desperate
When all the boys can't be men
Everybody knows
I'm her friend
Everybody knows
I'm her man
Ra-a-a-aspberry swirl

Comments

[rhonan.livejournal.com]

Crap, looks like another memo that I missed. So what exactly is this Gay agenda that I'm supposed to be an agent of? Do I have to recruit HS kids? I do like my men younger, but not that young.

[neversremedy.livejournal.com]

I guess we don't actually fuck them ... something like, giving them pink pamphlets and encouraging them to kiss other HS students of their own age? I didn't get the memo, either; apparently, the Religious Right intercepted my copy, and are furious!

If we're in an army, where's my uniform? And my gun, damnit! I'm sitting by waiting for my purple rifle with the pink daises, but no one's been bringing it by. Did you get your lightly scented conscription notice yet?

[rhonan.livejournal.com]

We don't get uniforms. Us bi folk are supposed to be the stealth queers that sneak in under the good Christian's Gaydar.

Bisexual Ninjas

[neversremedy.livejournal.com]

Oh! No wonder I'm good at that sort of thing ... I just never put it together with my sexual preferences.

Re: Bisexual Ninjas

[rhonan.livejournal.com]

Yeah, I know what you mean. Fortunately those nice folks at the Family Research Council let me know the roll I play in the Queer Conspiracy(tm).

Re: Bisexual Ninjas

[neversremedy.livejournal.com]

Aren't they fabulous to be so kind to us? *blinks lashes*